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Home Page » Entertainment » Artist Listing
 

UFO: Loch Ness Monster Sighted in Colorado

 

I was trying to write an article about the Loch Ness Monster when Xrytspet from Fanton in G10009845788899990766 stuck her nose into my business again.

Xrytspet: Your writing about something you know nothing about.

Hack Writer: I always start out that way, or nearly always. This one started in my dentist office while I was reading National Geographic. Go away!

Xrytspet: I'm taking a spin in the FnL7 Time Craft. I thought you would like to come along.

Hack: Go away, Xrytspet!

Xrytspet; I'm going back 75 million years. I want to take a look at the Western Interior Seaway.

Hack: The what?

Xrytspet: I'm leaving. If you want to go, you had better lift your butt off that chair.

That's when Xrytspet levitated me and the next thing I knew I was in the FnL7 Time Craft speeding back in time. As we flew, Xrytspet talked.

Xrytspet: You are incredibly ignorant of the history of your planet, Taylor Jones, the hack writer. It seems I'm always explaining things to you.

Hack: You were there. I wasn't.

Xrytspet: I'll tell you a secret. That building next to the Police Station is what's called a library. They have books in there and you don't need money to get them. They loan them out.

Hack: You're such a smart butt, Xrytspet.

Xrytspet: "The Western Interior Seaway is an ancient intracontinental seaway that occupied much of modern western North America and existed throughout much of the Cretaceous Period."

Hack: Which statement you quoted word for word from one of those books.

Xrytspet: Not exactly. I copied it from http://serc.carleton.edu/resources/1857.html.

Hack: I though so. Look! We're there! Good heavens what is that thing?

Xrytspet: That is the Thalassmedon, your Loch Ness monster. (See http://www.oceansofkansas.com/longneck.html and http://www.oceansofkansas.com/denver.html.)

Hack: That creature has a neck 20 feet long. It's a type of plesiosaur, isn't it? Each of its four flippers is as big as a man. Let this thing hover higher. It's snapping at us.

Xrytspet: We're not fish and it's slow because it keeps big stones in its belly.

Hack: It's doesn't seem to care. Throw it an apsopelix.

An apsopelix is a bony fish, or was. See http://www.keystonegallery.com/fossils/bony_fish.html.

Xrytspet: We've got to get out of here!

Hack: But we just got here and I want to see everything.

Xrytspet: Look on the projectile screen.

Hack: HOLY, COW! That's one humongous meteor.

Xrytspet: Say bye, bye to the Thalassmedon.

Author: John T Jones, Ph.D.
 
Author Bio:

John T Jones, Ph.D.

Jones was a vice president of a Fortune 500 company subsidiary having the major responsibility for research and development and certain engineering functions. After he retired, he became editor of an international trade magazine. Jones is Executive Representative of IWS, sellers of Tyler Hicks wealth-success books and kits. He is a direct mail and mail order marketer and operates a dozen websites.

He has written three technical books, four novels (Bull, Revenge on the Mogollon Rim, Bone China, and In No Way Guilty), and many published papers on business, marketing, engineering and other topics. Details on many of these topics can be found at his personal web site.

Jones is a hack poet and amateur landscape painter. He lives in Idaho with his wife of 52 years. He has five children, three in medicine, a lawyer, and a portrait artist. The Jones? have thirty-two talented grandchildren (many with special musical talent and skills), and one great grand child.

Jones is a prolific writer which started when he was an engineering professor at Iowa State University (Go Cyclones!). He doesn?t know how to stop.

This article can be searched using: orlando artist, famous artists, hip hop artist, graphic artist, tattoo artist, artist directory
 
 
 

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